Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Dante's Dating Inferno - Part 3

(Readers, if you are just tuning in to Dante's Dating Inferno, please see parts 1 and 2 for full effect..)

Then his friends show up - and I'm still not convinced this is a coincidence, as he claimed. And they are wankered. And not just drunk, they are putting some serious stuff up their noses. How do I know? Because one of my first conversations with one of them goes like this: "Hi, I'm Chris". "Hi, Nice to meet you. I'm Elizabeth. Or Liz." "Ok Liz, cool." Pause. "So Liz are you on anything tonight? Because I have some f*cking wicked ice here if you want some.....". Errr. No, thanks.

After 10 minutes I start looking around for my date. He's at the bar, lining up shots. I am unimpressed and start to get my things again, and he clocks me doing that, and rushes over with a drink for me. I am not to be swayed this time, I tip it out into a pot plant and leave.

Chuck Long: Righto, let Chuck get this straight. You are on a date with a dude who picked you up in a hotted up WRX with no actual thought process put into the evening. He quickly falls off the wagon and gets belligerent. On the same first date, his posse happens to show up at the same rat-hole RSL that you are at and just to make matters more interesting, they happen to have the inside lane on high quality Methamphetamine.

You shouldn't have left, you should have called Cleo and nominated this guy for “Cleo Bachelor of the Year”.

Hey, Chuck applauds your resilience but lets be honest, this guy may as well have had a red light attached to the top of his head. You needed to end this thing about an hour into the date.

Madame Boodwah, please reassure Chuck that he isn't being too tough on the young lady here?

Madame Boodwah: This guy takes the term ‘loser’ down to another level. You lay down with dogs you get up with flees, I’m glad you took the initiative to tip your drink into the pot plant and leave.

From Part 1 I think we clearly established this guy is not the kind of guy you take home to your mother. Dante have you ever sat down and thought about what kind of guy you’d like to have a relationship with or what you deserve? Maybe it’s a good time to start because you need to raise the bar here.

Chuck I think we should introduce ‘Reality Bytes Joker of the Year’. So far this train wreck takes the cake but readers please send us an email to see if you can take the spotlight from these Meth Chef’s.

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